Tempting tales

/in , /by

If you don’t have a story of your own, here’s one from Laurel Kirchner, author of the Kids of Integrity lessons, from her own teen years:

When I was in grade eight, there was extreme peer pressure to smoke cigarettes. Every lunch hour my friends and I would walk uptown and stop in at the bakery. As we walked, my friends would smoke and invite me to join them. Every day they pressured me to have a cigarette with them and every day I’d say, “No thanks.” In our group of five friends, I was the only one who didn’t smoke. I took it as a challenge to do the opposite of what the crowd wanted me to do.

My parents had told me that smoking would harm my body and that I shouldn’t do it. In obeying my parents, I was trusting that what they had taught me was right, even though all my friends were choosing to do the opposite.

Today I have a healthy, strong body and I don’t have a costly and harmful habit. Many people who started smoking when they were younger will tell you they regret the day they smoked their first cigarette. Am I ever glad I didn’t!

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 3:5 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding.”

Psalm 119:9-11 “How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to Your word. With my whole heart I seek You; let me not wander from Your commandments! I have stored up Your word in my heart, that I might not sin against You.”

Temptation alley

/in , /by

To introduce the activity, explain that making discerning choices in life is not always easy. Sometimes what’s right and wrong is obvious, but other times it’s not so clear.

As you share each scenario with your kids, let them decide which answer is the right course of action.

Continue with the game as you wish, making up your own scenarios. Take time to discuss your children’s answers.

When you’ve finished playing the game, use the discussion questions to guide you into a conversation about peer pressure.

Scenario 1:

Imagine we are walking in an alley and a family we know from church approaches us and asks us to help them rob a bank. They offer to split the money saying, “You won’t even be stealing. All you have to do is delay the police when they arrive by telling them your child has gone missing.”

What should we do?

a. Agree to help because we could use the extra money to take a great family holiday.
b. Say no and remind the other family that the Bible tells us that we are not to steal or lie.
c. Tell them we are already rich and suggest they ask a different family.
d. Rob the bank and give your family’s half of the money to the church so God can use it.

Scenario 2:

You are playing at the park with one of your friends. You see another kid you know approaching, and your friend whispers, “Don’t let them play with us.”

What do you do?

a. Ignore the kid and pretend you didn’t hear their request to join in.
b. Go home.
c. Tell your friend it would be nice to include the other child.
d. Tell the kid who wants to play that you are very sick and they wouldn’t want to catch your germs.

Scenario 3:

You are at a friend’s house and your moms are chatting in the next room. You and your friend are in the kitchen and he (or she) suggests that you take some gummy worms from the treat drawer.

What do you do?

a. Go along with your friend’s idea because you love candy.
b. Go and ask your mom if it would be okay to have a treat.
c. Tell your friend that you only eat the worms if they are covered in dirt.
d. Tell your friend you have a stomach ache and can’t eat one.

Scenario 4:

You and your brother / sister / friend are playing together in the playroom. While you are playing make believe, your brother / sister / friend begins to make the toys use language that you know is not allowed in your home (e.g. stupid, shut up, ugly, fatty).

What do you do?

a. Play along because it’s really the toys that are using the bad words, not you.
b. Ask them to quit using words that your parents do not allow you to say in real life.
c. Suggest that you all quit playing and go have a snack instead.
d. Go and tell your mom or dad what’s happening.

Scenario 5:

One of your brothers /sisters / friends is angry and pouting. Your other sibling / friend whispers to you that the pouter looks like the cartoon monkey you saw earlier in the day.

What do you do?

a. Laugh quietly about it.
b. Tell the one pouting to go look in the mirror.
c. Imitate the “monkey lips” and make monkey noises.
d. Pray and ask God to give you self-control.

Questions for discussion
  • Why do you think kids do wrong, even when they know it’s wrong?
  • Would you rather be known for doing right or doing wrong?
  • Is it easier for kids to talk each other into doing wrong, or doing right?
  • How can you help another kid do what’s right?
  • If you are unsure if something is right or wrong, what should you do?
  • What qualities do you think you should look for in a friend?
Key concepts

Life can be like walking through an alley where other people are offering us tempting opportunities to sin. If a kid chooses to hang out with kids who are constantly encouraging them to do wrong, they will eventually get into trouble.

On the other hand, choosing wise friends helps us stay out of trouble. The Bible warns us about this too. In Proverbs, God says we become like the people we are friends with (Proverbs 13:20). Given that fact, it makes sense to choose friends who will encourage us to do what’s right.

The best way to tell the difference between right and wrong is to ask God. Parents can also help kids make wise choices, but an even better idea is to walk so close to God that you get to know His voice well enough to avoid temptation and harm. If you are in a situation where you don’t know what to do, you should pray and check with your parents.

Relevant Scripture

Psalm 119:133 “Keep steady my steps according to Your promise, and let no iniquity get dominion over me.”

Proverbs 13:20 “Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise, but the companion of fools will suffer harm.”

Proverbs 16:29 “A man of violence entices his neighbor and leads him in a way that is not good.”

The tail doesn’t wag the dog

/in /by

Do you have a child in the family who likes to call the shots, perhaps even to the point that your family’s life revolves around what they want? Gently send your power hungry or manipulative child the message that “the tail doesn’t wag the dog.”

Find a friendly, even-tempered dog you can use for your object lesson. While the dog is wagging its tail, gently hold the tail to stop it from wagging. Now gently move the tail back and forth. Can you make the whole dog’s body “wag” back and forth just by wagging its tail?

Use the questions for discussion to explain that God expects parents to train their children, and He expects children to obey their parents.

Questions for discussion
  1. Who is the boss, the tail or the dog?
  2. Who is the leader in your family?
  3. Who is Dad or Mom’s leader?
  4. Why is it not a good idea for a child to try to lead their family?

Note: For more on this topic, see the Kids of Integrity lesson on obedience.

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 22:6 “Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.”

Isaiah 45:11-12 “Thus says the Lord, the Holy One of Israel, and the one who formed him: Ask Me of things to come; will you command Me concerning My children and the work of My hands? I made the earth and created man on it; it was My hands that stretched out the heavens, and I commanded all their host.”

Colossians 3:20 “Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.”

Choose your own adventure

/in , /by

You can make up your own “choose your own adventure” story, or read one from a book.

If you decide to tell your own story, have your children help you choose characters and a setting, and give your children the opportunity to direct the story by making choices. For example, you could begin by saying:

Braeden was so excited. His mom told him he could have a friend over for the afternoon.

Then pause and ask: Who should he invite over?

Continue with: The plan was to go to the park or to go swimming.

Pause and ask: Which activity did Braeden and his friend choose to do?

As you continue telling the story, blend a conflict into the storyline, letting your kids come up with a resolution. Finish by reviewing the questions for discussion and your choice of the Bible verses listed below.

In closing, pray together and ask God to help you make wise choices and be willing to follow His plans, even when they seem a little scary! Ask God to help you trust Him just like many of the characters in the Bible did. Your prayer can be based on one of the Scripture verses included here.

Sample prayer:
Dear God, please give us ears that are tuned in to listen to Your voice and help us to be willing to follow the directions You give us. We don’t want to be like sheep who end up lost and on the wrong path. We want to live life following Your plans, not our own (Isaiah 53:6). Amen.

Questions for discussion
  1. Can you think of a story in the Bible where someone had to trust God in a scary situation?
  2. How is life like a “choose your own adventure” story?
Key concepts

Life is a lot like a “choose your own adventure” story because life is full of choices. If you ask Him, God will help you make choices that lead you to live out an exciting “life story” that He has planned for your life.

God has written thousands of amazing stories. The Bible is full of them! When you know those stories well, they help you know the right choices to make – the kinds of choices that please God.

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 3:5-7 “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make straight your paths.”

Psalm 16:11 “You make known to me the path of life; in Your presence there is fullness of joy; at Your right hand are pleasures forevermore.”

Isaiah 53:6 “All we like sheep have gone astray; we have turned – every one – to his own way; and the Lord has laid on Him the iniquity of us all.”

Note: This activity fits well with the story “Moving without a van” from the Bible stories section of this lesson.

Foolish Freddie, lazy Eddie game

/in , /by

Sometimes people work so hard to avoid working that they put more time and effort into avoiding the work than it would have taken to complete the job itself! Lazy people lived in Biblical times too and some of their excuses are recorded in the book of Proverbs. “There is a lion out there and it will kill me!” is the best one!

Tell your kids about these ancient excuses, then ask your children what kinds of excuses they have made up, or heard from others.
Have fun taking turns coming up with outlandish excuses a person could make in order to avoid the work they have been asked to do. Begin each excuse with, “Lazy Eddie says . . .” or “Foolish Freddie says . . .” Here are some ideas:

  • I’m allergic to sunshine  (or cobwebs, dust, dirt, work in general).
  • I’m scared of bugs (or weeds, spiders, worms).
  • There are hungry rats roaming the neighbourhood, looking for kids to chew on.
  • There are giant, invisible elastic bands around my legs and arms so I can’t move.
  • I can’t do the dishes; the soap will eat my skin.
  • Work is like swimming: you’re not supposed to work with a full stomach, and I just had a snack.

After you have laughed over the silly excuses, use the discussion questions to talk about speaking the truth versus creating exaggerated excuses that are really lies.

Questions for discussion
  • What does the word “sluggard” mean?
  • What is the opposite of “lazy”?
  • Why do people make up excuses to avoid work?
  • What’s the silliest excuse you’ve ever heard?
  • If you were a boss, would you hire lazy people or industrious people?
  • What does God think about lying?
  • If you were married, would you want a husband or wife who willingly helps with the work around the house, or would you want to do all the work yourself while your husband or wife sits around and does nothing?
Key concepts

It would have been rare for lions to roam the streets of towns in Bible times, just as it would be extremely rare for us to see a rat on a residential street in Canada. The verses in Proverbs show us how silly it sounds when people make excuses as to why they cannot work.

Making up reasons that are false is a form of lying and God hates it when people lie! Work does not disappear just because we don’t want to do it. Attempting to avoid work is foolish, as eventually the person will be required to do the job anyway.

The opposite of lazy is industrious. God is pleased when we work with a diligent and willing attitude instead of making up lies to try to get out of work.

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 12:22 “Lying lips are an abomination to the Lord, but those who act faithfully are His delight.”

Proverbs 22:13 “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion outside! I shall be killed in the streets!’ ”

Proverbs 26:13 “The sluggard says, ‘There is a lion in the road! There is a lion in the streets!’ ”

Library lessons

/in , /by

Before your next library visit, select containers to transport your books. Book bags, backpacks, plastic bins with re-sealable lids or baskets with handles all work well. To make it easier for your children to be personally responsible for their books, plan to transport and store the library books in the same container. Each child should have their own special container.

Use humour to review the book care rules listed below. After reading the basic list of rules, have your kids make up their own rhyming or comical version of each rule. Review your rules on the way to and from the library. You might also want to show your kids the online video Don’t Let the Pigeon Touch the Books.

Basic book care rules:

  • Wash your hands before reading your books.
  • Don’t consume food or drink while reading your books.
  • Keep your books away from pets and small children.
  • Be careful with your books as you come and go from the library.
  • Store your books in a safe place.
  • Water ruins books! Keep your books away from the bathtub, water bottles and sneezes.
  • Books have all the stories and pictures they need already, so don’t add any more words or drawings.

Humorous book care rules:

  • Books think you’re mean if you read with hands that aren’t clean.
  • Mixing books and food is really quite rude.
  • Babies slobber, dogs chew. That’s why books would rather have you.
  • Only crooks wet books. / Books will fret if you get them wet.
  • Books have words and stories galore. No need for you to add any more!
  • If you’re going to cough or sneeze, don’t use your book as a tissue, please!
  • Dropping, throwing or using books as weapons is strictly prohibited.

On your next visit to the library, let your children place their books in the book-return slot themselves. Show them how to put the books in the return slot spine first, to avoid bending the pages or the cover.

You might also ask a librarian to review basic book handling and care with your children.

At home, affirm your children for being responsible about caring for their books. As a reward, apply Luke 16:10 by allowing them to borrow additional books from the library next time.

Relevant Scripture

Luke 16:10 “One who is faithful in a very little is also faithful in much, and one who is dishonest in a very little is also dishonest in much.”

Lent beyond the Easter season

/in , /by

First, explain to your children the concept of Lent. (You’ll find help with this in the key concepts below.)

Next, decide with your kids how you can make a small monetary sacrifice for each day of the week, in accordance with how you have been blessed. Here are some ideas to get your kids truly “counting their blessings” as a means of deciding how much money to give to the poor, but feel free to choose other ideas too:

Monday: Donate a dime for each toy in the house.
Tuesday: Give a loonie for each piece of candy you ate this past week.
Wednesday: Donate a quarter for each CD, video, DVD, or Blu-ray disc you own.
Thursday: Set aside a nickel for each pen, pencil and felt marker in your home.
Friday: Donate ten cents for each pair of socks you own.
Saturday: Contribute a nickel for each book your family owns.
Sunday: Give 50 cents for each pair of shoes your family owns.

At the end of the week, deliver the money you’ve set aside to the person or the charity that God has directed you to.

Key concepts

Many Christians practice the tradition of Lent during the 40 days before Easter. During Lent, people often choose to fast, which means giving up food or certain activities – such as watching TV – in order to seek God more intently. As part of Lent, many people also look for special ways to serve others, or they put aside money to help others.

People choose to make these small sacrifices – like giving up their food, or their time, or entertainment – to remind them what a big sacrifice Jesus made when He gave up His life for us. It also helps them to practice being like Jesus.

We made our “sacrifice” of money so we could practice being like Jesus too, and to show our compassion for those who have much less than we have.

Relevant Scripture

1 John 3:17 “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?”

Mercy tales

/in , /by

Perhaps you can tell your kids about the time you had a flat tire and someone stopped to help. Describe in detail how their help made you feel. Or perhaps you can tell about a time when you received undeserved mercy or forgiveness.

If you don’t have a story of your own, here’s a story from our Kids of Integrity writer Laurel Kirchner, for you to share instead.

Forgotten buns and a kind cashier
It was one of those days when there was too much to do and too little time. I’m usually very organized, but this particular day I let one important detail fall through the cracks. It was Bus Driver Appreciation Day at my boys’ school and I had forgotten to bring the dozen cinnamon buns I had signed up to bring.

I only had a five-minute window of time to buy the buns at a nearby grocery store and get them to the school.

Fortunately my local bakery had fresh cinnamon buns available. Feeling great relief, I took two packages of six up to the cashier, only to find that I did not have my credit card with me. I only had enough money for one package.

When I explained the situation to the cashier, she let me take both packages and told me to come back later to pay for the second package. The mercy she offered me that day made a big difference for me. The bus drivers got their cinnamon buns and I was so grateful that I was able to fulfill my commitment to supply the buns.

I did go back and pay for the cinnamon buns and thanked the cashier for her trust and gracious generosity. Had I not returned to pay, the cashier would have needed to pay for the second package of buns with her own money.

After you tell your story, read Proverbs 11:25 to your children. Let them know that when a person is kind to another person, it’s not just the one who was helped who gets the benefits; the one who did the helping is blessed too.

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 11:25 “Whoever brings blessing will be enriched, and one who waters will himself be watered.”

Compassionate caregivers

/in , /by

See if your children can name some caring professions without your help. As you drive around town, look for places where people in these occupations would work, such as hospitals, clinics, ambulance stations and churches.

Talk about how these people care for others, and use the discussion questions to discuss Jesus’ role as a compassionate healer. Point out that another name for God is Jehovah Rophe, meaning “Lord our healer” (Exodus 15:26).

Take time to pray and thank God for people who work in the caring professions. In the future, when you hear sirens or pass an accident scene, encourage your children to pray for the emergency workers and the people needing their help.

Questions for discussion
  • Who do you go and see if you are very sick?
  • When a person goes to the hospital with a broken leg, who cares for them?
  • How would you feel if a nurse was mean and callous to you?
  • Who comes to our home if we call an ambulance?
  • If we have some questions about God, or we need someone to pray for us, who can we go to for help?
Key concepts

We are very fortunate to live in a country where we have many sources for help and healing. If our bodies are hurt, we can get help from the paramedics working on an ambulance unit who take us to the hospital, or we can see a doctor. Medical professionals help us get the medicine or surgery needed to help our bodies fight germs or be mended.

We can also pray and ask God to help heal any injuries or illnesses we get. Not only does God promise to heal us physically, He also says He will heal us spiritually. Sin is a sickness of our hearts that only God can heal.

The Bible is full of stories about Jesus healing people physically and forgiving their sins. Jesus not only cares about our bodies being well, He also wants the spiritual part of us to be healthy too. (Our “spirit” is often referred to as our “heart.” You can also think of your spirit as being the quiet, private part of you that has the ability to talk with and know God.)

Relevant Scripture

Psalm 91:14 “Because he holds fast to Me in love, I will deliver him; I will protect him, because he knows My name.”

Psalm 103:1-3 “Bless the Lord, O my soul, and all that is within me bless His holy name! Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits, who forgives all your iniquity, who heals all your diseases . . .”

Matthew 14:14 “When He went ashore He saw a great crowd, and He had compassion on them and healed their sick.”

Matthew 20:34 “And Jesus in pity touched their eyes, and immediately they recovered their sight and followed Him.”

1 Peter 2:24 “He Himself bore our sins in His body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By His wounds you have been healed.”

Note: For two related discussions see the Bible story “hungry mouths and hungry hearts” from this lesson and “a task requiring teamwork and determination” in the Bible stories section of the cooperation lesson.

My sweet baby

/in /by

Tell some stories about your children when they were younger, and reminisce about how cute and treasured they were as infants. Describe how you had to feed, dress and carry your children when they were just helpless babies, and how you even had to help them hold their head up when they were newborns.

Explain that God puts a special love in a parent’s heart for their offspring, and that a parent’s deep desire to care for and protect their baby is a kind of compassion. Because of this compassion, a parent does everything they can to ensure that their children are kept safe and healthy.

Emphasize that the Bible likens God’s compassion for His children to that of a parent, but His love is so amazing that it goes far beyond even a parent’s love.

Relevant Scripture

Isaiah 49:15 “Can a woman forget her nursing child, that she should have no compassion on the son of her womb? Even these may forget, yet I will not forget you.”

Psalm 103:13 “As a father shows compassion to his children, so the Lord shows compassion to those who fear Him.”