Introduce your children to the Hebrew word Shalom. Shalom is traditionally used as a greeting. Shalom Aleichem means “Peace be with you.” Although many people use the term casually, as we would say “hello” or “good-bye,” the word Shalom has a much deeper meaning.

Explain that Shalom is a sense of wholeness and well-being that exists when we are at peace with God and others because we have allowed God to forgive our sins and replace our sinful human nature with His new nature (Romans 8:5-8). Everyday circumstances occur that require us to ask God to send His Holy Spirit to bring Shalom into our lives. Philippians 4:6-7 says, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” It is wanting things “my way” or our sinful nature that tempts us to want to repay evil for evil, to be first and to have the biggest and the best for ourselves. But Jesus tells us that the first will be last. He teaches us His way: to share what we have, to give generously and to forgive others readily. Following our sin nature fosters discord, but Jesus’ way promises peace.

Through familiarizing your children with the significance of this word, you can expand their vocabulary and their understanding of God’s role in bringing peace into our lives. For younger children, you may want to complete these activities over the course of a few days. If you prefer, these activities can be done using the word peace instead of Shalom.

• Begin by asking your children to imagine that they are in the Garden of Eden. Pretend to be walking around together, looking at all of the wonderful plants and animals God created. Point at butterflies flying by, pet an otter and perhaps go for a ride on a tiger. Highlight what a privilege it would be to walk and talk with God as Adam and Eve did. Emphasize the reverence and awe you would experience being in the presence of God. Tell your children that because Adam and Eve had not yet sinned, they were able to be in God’s presence and experience complete shalom.
• Ask your children if they know how Adam and Eve ruined the peace that existed between themselves and God. Liken this to a child sneaking a cookie. A child who has taken a cookie without asking permission does not want to be seen by a parent.
• Pretend to be Adam and Eve hiding from God. Explain how the snake tricked you into doing it and tell God how sorry you are for eating the fruit He asked you not to eat. Dramatize crying after God asks you to leave the garden. Sit down and pretend to pull weeds and dig up the hard dirt outside of the Garden of Eden. Illustrate that just as we hate weeds in our garden, so God hates sin. While continuing to pull the pretend weeds, explain that in order to bring restore peace between God and man, God chose to send His Son, Jesus, into the world to die for our sins. Jesus died to take the punishment for our sins. He did this so that anyone who asks can have their sins forgiven and find peace through having a relationship with God (John 3:16, John 14:6 and 1 John 1:8-9). Read aloud Jesus’ promise from John 14:27: “Peace I leave with you; My peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
• Next, encourage your children by explaining that when we choose live with Jesus’ attitude in our hearts we experience the peace He promises.

After explaining “my way” versus “Jesus’ way” to your children, have them role-play situations where they can practice. Have your children practice saying: “I am feeling upset about ______________. Instead of (yelling/crying/hitting/sulking/whining), I will pray and tell God about the problem. Then I know that Jesus’ peace will protect my heart and mind from having a bad attitude.” Here are some example situations:

• Make playdough cookies decorated with playdough chocolate chips/candy, and pretend to bake them. After they are “done,” hand them out. Be sure to make a big production of giving one child a bigger cookie with more candy on it. Ask the child who was given the less appealing cookie how they feel. Explain that Satan tempts us to get the best for ourselves. Ask what they think Jesus would tell people to do (Luke 6:30-31, 38, Acts 20:35, 1 John 3:16-18).
• Have a race or a contest. Someone will win and someone will lose. Ask how the loser feels. Ask if they think most people would want to be first or last in a competition. Further open the discussion by saying, “Most people do want to be first instead of last, but what did Jesus say about being first (Mark 9:35)?”
• Pretend that you are playing in the park or having a snowball fight. Someone splashes mud on you or throws a snowball in your face. How would you feel? People might say that you are entitled to get upset and seek revenge when someone wrongs you. To contrast this attitude, ask the question, “What do you think Jesus would do if someone hurt Him?” Promote further dialogue by asking, “How many times do you think Jesus would want you to forgive someone for bothering you (Matthew 18:21-22)?”

Close by pretending to bring out a large, beautifully wrapped gift. Have your children guess who the amazing gift is from. After the guesses have been completed, explain that gifts usually do come from people who love us. Ask if they know who loves them more than anyone else. Explain that God’s love is bigger than the sky (Psalm 108:4) and that Shalom is such a great gift, only God can give it to us. Make it clear that it is God’s Holy Spirit living in us, which can bring peace to our lives (Galatians 5:16-26). Tell them the good news that God is delighted to give us Shalom (His peace) when we ask Him to. Pray together and ask for the good gift of the Holy Spirit to bring peace to your family.

Challenge your family to use the word Shalom as a greeting, but also as a way of saying, “I forgive you,” “I want the best for you, not myself,” or “I share with you in the joy of your success.” Explain that whenever a family member says Shalom to another, they are saying, “I choose to let God bring peace to this relationship.”

Prepare some fancy food beforehand by cutting regular sandwiches into tiny squares. Serve them on fancy plates along with veggie sticks, cheese and crackers. Pour glasses of water or juice and plan to serve them with lemon or orange slices as a garnish. While you are preparing the food, have your children begin collecting dress-up clothes and old sunglasses. Finally, you will need to cut out black paper circles to cover the lenses in the sunglasses. Ensure you have a roll of tape handy.

Have fun dressing up with your kids. Pretend to be movie stars or other famous figures such as athletes or musicians. As you play, explain that many people who star in movies, concerts or in sporting events become so popular that whenever they go out in public, people swarm around them, asking for their autograph or to have their picture taken with the star. To avoid being recognized by the general public, popular figures sometimes wear dark sunglasses as a disguise. Give each of your children a pair of sunglasses to put on as well, to conceal their identity from the “adoring public.” Take turns strutting around the house and being “mobbed” by fans (other members of the family) who persistently request autographs or photo opportunities.

As your kids begin to tire of this pretend play, explain that stars are often invited to nice restaurants. Restaurant owners like to have these popular people visit their restaurants regularly, because then other people want to eat there too, making the restaurant famous. Pretend your kitchen table is a fancy restaurant and have your kids “order” special food. While you are enjoying your snacks, use the questions for discussion to guide your conversation about the dangers of popularity.

Questions for discussion

• Would you like to be famous some day? Why or why not?
• Is anyone in our family famous?
• As much fun as it is to be the centre of attention, why might popularity be dangerous?
• In what ways do you think famous people are tempted to sin?
• When might you or I be tempted to think we are “pretty good”?

At this point have your children tape black circles over the lenses of their sunglasses.

• What can you see now?
• How is pride like the black paper on your glasses?
• If you or I think we are righteous, what are we then tempted to do?
• Are you fooling anyone if you say that you are not a sinner? (1 John 1:8-10)
• Is anyone really righteous?
• How does God view our righteous acts?
• Who do you fool when you think that you are “really something”? (Galatians 6:3)
• Whose actions are you to “test” or judge? (Galatians 6:4)
• Should you say good things about yourself? (Proverbs 27:2)

Key concepts

There are advantages and disadvantages to being famous or popular. Certainly it is fun to be invited to parties and to have other people give you a lot of attention. But one of the disadvantages is that popularity can tempt a person to begin to think too highly of themselves. If you are always the centre of attention it is easy to start thinking, “Everybody likes me so much; I must be pretty special.” Even if we are not famous, there are still ways that the sin of pride can sneak up on us. For example, if we are very good at a particular sport or activity, we can start to feel proud of ourselves.

Another way we can be prideful is when we start to compare ourselves to others, judging the sin we see in their lives. Pride is like the black paper on our glasses, because it “blinds” us from seeing our own sinfulness. Just as popularity can “blind” famous people from seeing that everyone is as valuable as they are, so pride makes us unable to see our own faults.

If we are proud of our own righteousness (thinking we are someone special), we fool ourselves. The Bible tells us that nobody is righteous and that we all have sinned. Each of us is to be concerned only about our own actions. God doesn’t want us to judge others for their actions. Instead, He wants us to look at and evaluate our own hearts. The Bible also tells us that we should let others praise us, rather than praising ourselves.

Close by praying and asking God to give you all humble hearts that desire to honour Him, instead of trying to gain attention and recognition for yourselves.

Relevant Scripture

Proverbs 27:2 “Let another praise you, and not your own mouth; someone else, and not your own lips.”

Romans 3:22-24 “This righteousness from God comes through faith in Jesus Christ to all who believe. There is no difference, for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by His grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”

Galatians 6:2-5 “Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ. If anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself. Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else, for each one should carry his own load.”

1 John 1:8-10 “If we claim to be without sin, we deceive ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. If we claim we have not sinned, we make Him out to be a liar and His Word has no place in our lives.”

Make a point of talking with your kids about responding appropriately when someone is kind to him or her. Examples of situations that can make children uncomfortable include:

• receiving compliments about his/her clothing or abilities
• being offered food that he/she does not want to eat
• opening a gift that does not appeal to him/her
• being invited to play with another child

Help your kids come up with a plan on how to say thank you when someone compliments his or her clothes, artwork or abilities. Practice a proper response for when they are invited by another child to play. Explore ideas as to how to politely decline food and say a sincere thank you for an unwanted gift.

Using role-play will give your children the confidence to respond kindly, without hurting the feelings of those who have been kind to them. To add interest to the role-play, stage a puppet show and have your children use their stuffed animals or dolls as the actors.

Challenge your children to be kind instead of paying back wrong for wrong, and encourage them to bless those who curse them (1 Thessalonians 5:15, Luke 6:28). Talk to them about what to do when others are unkind to them. Help them plan a response ahead of time. You can further add to their learning by doing some role-playing.

Here are some examples you can use:

• Someone takes the toy you are playing with. Instead of grabbing it back forcefully, have your children try saying, “I was playing with that. Can I have it back please?” to solve the problem.
• A friend says, “Where did you get that dress” (implying that the dress is not very nice). Although it might be tempting for your child to tell her that she doesn’t like her clothes either, have your child review a different response, such as “I’m sorry you don’t like my dress; I really like the colour of your outfit.”

Relevant Scripture

1 Thessalonians 5:15 “Make sure that nobody pays back wrong for wrong, but always try to be kind to each other and to everyone else.”

Luke 6:28 …bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you.”